anew

a new quarter... means a new start...

since there has been several major changes in the scorecard system and promo standards... whether i like it or not... i have no choice but to accept it... i have been struggling for a year now... well i guess it isn't really time yet, but i really wonder when will that be? from rolling calendar, now it's calendar quarter. meaning if your stats failed in april, you can no longer use may and june, instead you need to start in july again... sigh...

will i be able to make it? i hope so...


~grazhishu~

super down remedy

When you're super down, I think the following would be the best remedy... This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror where one could read it everyday. You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.

~There are at least two people in this world that you would die for. ~

~At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.~

~The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.~

~A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.~

~Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.~

~You mean the world to someone.~

~You are special and unique.~

~Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.~

~When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.~

~When you think the world has turned its back on you take another look.~

~Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.~

can I be Ariel Lin?

if there is just one person i would be exchanging places with...
then that would definitely be ARIEL LIN!!! (can i? wink*wink*)

why? not that I like her a lot, I actually don't like her that much...

there is actually just one reason...
just one... ♥Ü♥



ARIEL LIN a.k.a. Lin Yi Chen is one of the most famous taiwanese actresses nowadays. I saw her first in the taiwanese drama It Started With A Kiss (ISWAK) which was based from the Japanese Manga Itazuranakiss. I actually hated her that time because she looked so stupid and so ugly, that was i think in 2006, when ABS CBN adopted and dubbed the series in tagalog.

But infairness, she does act well. I had no choice but to watch ISWAK because i really liked the lead actor (Joe Cheng) though i was really annoyed to see her face. After that, there were several shows aired in other tv networks with her as the main/lead actress. I also saw Vic Zhou's music video featuring her, that was I think, Make A Wish. Then I realized, maybe she really is something else... or should I say she really is SOMEONE FAMOUS in Taiwan.

Years passed and she's just getting more and more popular. I also noticed that in her other other series, she actually looks fine. Then I thought, maybe it was just really for ISWAK that they made her look so silly and ugly. Well that may have also contributed to the huge success of that drama, coz who would have thought that there will be a sequel after that?!? She also had several series with other actors like mike he (love contract) and wu zun (tokyo juliet); and several commercials and endorsements as well.

Just recently, the sequel of ISWAK: They Kiss Again (TKA), began airing in Taiwan, December 16, 2007. I have been dying to see this since March 2007, that was when I heard that they've began filming the sequel. Her appearance on this one really changed a lot. She became pretty unexpectedly, for me. From a silly plain looking girl, she was transformed to a fine pretty young lady. Joe Cheng changed as well, he was more good looking on this one compared to the first season. His hair was shorter and it really looked good on him! So kawai!!! Ü

This series really showed a lot of kissing scenes and other unexpected scenes, I was always blown away. Definitely better than the first season, this one's so hilarious! :P I was so envious that I almost died watching xiang qin (ariel lin) kissing zhi shu (joe cheng). It wasn't just once, twice or thrice... I actually can no longer count using my 2 hands!!! waaaahhhhh! and this is what freaks me out!!! I am so jealous!!!! she has kissed him so many many many times, who knows how many?

...

So do I still need to explain why i'd like to exchange places with her?
OMG, she's really one hell of a lucky girl! I really wish I'd be her.... damn!

~grazhishu~

incarcerated

i very much love freedom... well, who doesn't, in the first place?
this is also the main reason why i studied in UP...
not that i would be doing whatever i want...
but, that i would have freedom to do what i think is right...

but right now, i feel like i'm jailed, there is so much injustice...
i'm given so little time but there's so much to do...
i barely have time to chat and check my personal mails.
that's actually just fine... i'm very much willing to finish all the tasks...
the problem is, we are not given the privilege to freely render OTs...
all should be pre-approved (in other words, granted before hand)...
how am i suppose to know if i'll be able to finish all those escalations?
that is not until i'm left with less than an hour before i log out...
my point is just simple, i just need ample time to finish all my tasks...
to have ample time, i would need to render OT and that's fine...
but we shouldn't be hindered or questioned for doing that...
we're not even doing OT just to chat or to be just PETIKS inside the ops...
i'm not doing it for my sake... i don't like going home late, hello?!
we're doing OT so we can complete our deliverables and
so that responses would be provided within the TAT...

sigh...

but i guess i'm just unlucky...
imprisoned of work without ample time...
this again makes me wanna cry... :'-(

~inFAIRness~

inFAIRness... is eTelecare LIBIS 1 and 2's site GA, held today from 7am - 1pm. I was there... :)

I just got home from the FAIR... I had to go to avail of the dress down privilege for the last two weeks of March. in addition, I was also kind of interested to see what it looked like.

Teasers were kind of inviting... so I said “why not check it out?”

Booths from high school days were there: marriage booth, jail booth, gaming booths, henna and glitter tattoo booth, etc. and guess what? Right after we registered, I was immediately caught by one of the sheriffs (from Cingular) for wearing an ID, which of course I’m not aware of since I’ve just arrived… take note, I went there right after my shift so I really haven’t taken off my ID. But that’s fine since I heard proceeds would be given to aid the operation of one of their team mates, I just paid p30 for immunity to end the conversation. There were song and dance numbers from different programs as well.

There’s also free food. Hotdogs, fish balls, squid balls, macaroni & cheese, cotton candy and ice cream. Free drinks of course, we’ve got portable pantry… haha ;p

Hmmm it was fun… not super... just so so... pero pwede na rin.. ;p
at least I get to go on dress down until end of March and that was my main goal.

~dress down~~dress down~

and i'm now on off!!! weeeeeeeeeee! Ü

hanging by a moment

a lot of people are leaving... and this really makes me sad...

just last night, i heard one of my colleagues planning to submit a resignation letter... sigh... besides the annual program ramp down in january, there are still many others who leave unexpectedly... some bid goodbye, others just leave without a trace...

actually, i have had several plans or should i say attempts to resign as well... i have always felt tired of what i'm doing and this keeps on getting worse everyday (meaning i'm getting more tired and more lazy as days pass by ;p)... but i really cannot make up my mind due to several reasons:

1. i'm the eldest child, so i'm a provider...
2. my brother is a fresh graduate educ board passer (he's actually 4th placer in the 2007 LET for 2ndary educ... infairness! Ü). he's already working but his salary is really bad! (hahaha ;p) but he'll be transferring this june.
3. i'll be adjusting again to a new environment
4. i'll be leaving a lot of friends
5. i need to socialize to make new friends
6. another application/interview which i hate the most (haha ;p)
7. i'm afraid the offer (salary) would not be higher
8. i'll be missing our coffee vendo in the pantry... where you choose the flavor, just push the button and viola! hot coffee mix for free!!!Ü
9. i'll miss the unlimited iced tea and juice as well... which are, by the way, also free!
10. i'm not sure whether to look for a job for my course or just look for another call center

there are only 2 things that would definitely make me transfer:

1. - more accessible work location and
2. - high compensation package offer

these are just 2 "to leave" reasons compared to 10 "not to leave" reasons i listed above... no wonder i've always considered staying rather than leaving. i have asked for several signs... but apparently, i'm not getting any. so i'll be waiting again... then maybe i'll be able to decide if i should stay or if i should leave... for now... i feel like everything is hanging... hanging because i'm undecided... and hanging because i'm so tired, wanna hang on a swing just like this bear... ;p

transport strike

since i'm on the graveyard shift, i log out and go home in the morning.
earlier this day, i logged out at 630, went out of the office almost 7 am, reached philcoa at 730. i was with my officemate. we waited there in front of mcdonalds for almost half an hour. aircon buses were very rare, most are jeepneys, taxis, fxs and ordinary buses. we rode in an fx with sm lagro hilltop route. i was in lagro at about 820, i waited again for about 10 mins until i was able to ride a jeepney that goes inside our subdivision... but the story doesn't end there... that's not even the start yet.

what really pissed me off is what happened after passing over fatima university in hilltop... slowly the vehicles started to pile up... traffic was moving very slow... before we reached mater carmeli, from afar you can already see a lot people walking down the streets... then the jeepney driver told us that there were other drivers on the street who are forcing other drivers to stop and participate in the transpo strike. but it's not only that, they are also forcing the passengers to get off and just walk from mater up to lagro or maybe up to sm fairview...

is that fair? of course not! that is so annoying!!!

i mean there's nothing wrong with organizing and participating in transpo strikes. i'm also alarmed of how fast oil price hikes occur in a month or sometimes just in a week's span. i do understand that they are just fighting for their principles and they're doing for the good of all the operators and drivers... there's definitely nothing wrong if you want your voice to be heard...
BUT... is it right that they smash wind shields of jeepneys who do not want to participate and that they force even the passengers to get off the public vehicle. definitely NOT!!!

i even heard one of them shout "makisama ka naman pare! kanina ka pa biyahe ng biyahe! nakailang daan ka na dito ah! ililista ko na yang plate number mo, lagot ka samin pag pumasada ka pa!"

what an attitude?!?

their goal is indeed noble, BUT "the way" that they use to implement it? is very unfair and unacceptable!!! if you wanna be heard, you can always speak up, but using VIOLENCE has never been an answer to problems/crisis like this. that is actually in a way being SELFISH... the "i don't care about you, i will fight for my right!" attitude... they don't care about other citizen's welfare... they definitely don't mind seeing passengers walking under the sizzling sun and for sure, they never thought of other drivers who would like to earn just a little for their family before the strike starts.

they should have allowed others until let's say 9am, just an allowance so students and regular employees would be able to reach their destinations. BUT NO! they really wanted everyone to be affected just so they can fight for their right... i actually consider myself lucky because i'm already on my way home... but how about the students and those employees working at daytime who are just about to go to work?!? for sure most of them will not arrive on time! and those selfish drivers, THEY JUST DON'T CARE!!!

this is again an example of exploited democracy...
sadly, most filipinos have taken advantage of this freedom...
for every opposing ideas/beliefs/principles, resultant is always a rally or strike...
there is no wonder why this country is in such mess...

and nobody knows when this is all gonna end... or will this ever end???

my own diversion

there are times when you feel like you've just had enough of everything... that you've been so tired of everything you do... sometimes due to problems that you encounter everyday... and the never ending responsibilities that you need to fulfill... or due to tragic events you've experienced, whether it be with a close family member, a friend or a special someone... like losing someone you love thru an accident, thru a third party or just because he/she fell out of love...

well for me, dwelling on the situation will just make you more helpless.. the more you pity yourself, thinking how less fortunate and less worthy you are because of what happened... the more that you sink further and further down until you can no longer recover.

i know it's so easy to say but so hard to do... however, i think this would be the best way. that is to think how fortunate you are compared to other people and to divert your attention to other things. you may engage or join other activities. your situation is actually not the worst of all. there are many other people in this world who are less fortunate and who do not enjoy the things that you already have. to divert your attention, you may go to the gym for work out, go to the mall and watch movies, attend a fund raising project or be a volunteer on a house building project for less fortunate people, hang out with your friends that you haven't seen for so long, etc... there's actually so much to do in this world other than to just think of your problem the whole day.

well as for me, what works best is watching my korean and taiwanese drama dvd collection... i know others would find it so boring or so corny, but i don't really care. though the stories sometimes are quite predictable and simple, they have the ability to enlighten/brighten up my mood. most of them are FEEL GOOD dramas... best suited for depressed/tired people or even for a normal person who just wants relaxation.

there is always this "KILIG" factor in this kdramas, which is what i rarely find in american series. you'll have this "KILIG" feeling just by seeing how the characters gaze at each other, the way they converse with each other, the way they hold hands, the way they hug and kiss... really very different from american/mexican series. i don't know if it's just me, but i feel like the emotions are so real, unlike those american series where i can't see any spark.

you might as well try and see for yourself... :)

~ aja! ~

sleep all day

i guess i really felt so tired the past week coz i spent the first day of my off sleeping... for about 12 long hours... zzzz... zzzz... zzzz... when i woke up, it's already midnight of saturday... hehehe ;p

but i think i deserve that because i've been lacking sleep eversince i shifted to graveyard sched and i almost reached the limit this past week coz i felt almost dozing off in the office. that really scared me a lot! i didn't expect that would happen because i'm used to having just a few hours of sleep. well then maybe my colleague is right, my immune system finally reached it's max limit, meaning i have had so much of inadequate sleep that it can no longer tolerate, so it eventually gave up... so it's just right that i slept that much. besides, sleeping is one of my favorite activities in this world... hehe ;p

but now i'm ok and i'm back on track!!! just ready for my long awaited and anticipated dvd marathons... i missed joe cheng so much!!! i also missed a little of yoon eun hye, ariel lin, lee da hae, lee ji hoon, lee dong wook... hehehe :)

pick one

sino ba ang mas mahalaga...

ang taong mahal mo o ang taong gusto mong mahalin?

ang taong kasama mo buong araw o ang taong iniisip mo bago matapos ang araw?

siya bang kasakasama mo sa lahat ng ginagawa mo

o siyang dahilan ng lahat ng galaw at kilos mo?

ung taong nais mong makasama habang buhay

o ung taong di mo makita ang habangbuhay pag wala siya?
sinong mas matimbang...

ung taong pag kasama mo'y parang kay bilis ng oras

o ung taong tuwing iniisip mo'y parang kay tagal ng oras?
ano ang susundin mo...

ang idinidikta mo sa puso mo ang ang idinidikta ng puso mo syo?

siya ba un laging pumapasok sa isip mo o siya un laging laman ng panaginip mo?

sino nga ba...

ang taong nagpaluha syo o ang taong nagpunas sa minsang pagluha mo?

ang taong nagpapatawa syo o ang taong dahilan ng lahat ng iyong emosyon?
sino nga bang pipiliin mo?

ang taong muling nagbukas ng puso mo o ang taong matagal ng nandoon...?????? ^_^

overworked?

i just had this threatening experience yesterday in the office... this is not a scary ghost story if that's what you're thinkin'.

i was just surprised that after working for more than 2 years now in this industry, that was the first time i had this... i work from 9pm to 6am daily. i was in the morning shift before though, and was just transferred to graveyard shift about 2 months ago. i do calls half of my shift and the remaining time, i spend for filing forms and client requests which most, if not all, use microsoft excel. of course, there are days also that we need to file whole day due to huge request volume. i was just so shocked because yesterday, while i was in the middle of compiling our database, i suddenly felt dizziness and shortness of breath. i was scared to death! thought i would just doze off... i was so nervous but i had no choice but to control myself... because the more nervous i get, the more difficult it was for me to breathe... felt like i'm almost dying... i paused for a while and closed my eyes... i actually prayed coz i no longer know what to do... it took quite some time before i felt ok again...

i felt so scared because i'm not used to it... well, maybe this is the sign that i really need a break... but how am i gonna do that?!? waaaaahhhhh!!!!

because of this, i thought that you really cannot say what's gonna happen next... and it's so true that anything can happen. one time you're ok, next time maybe not... you really can't tell...

Unwanted Hypothalamus

a friend of mine shared this beautiful article back in college. i liked it a lot... the words are so simple yet so striking! this is for those who have been in love... more on the one-sided love type... sigh... read on...

Unwanted Hypothalamus

-anonymous-

Make me numb…

so when I see you again,

my cardiac muscles wouldn’t have to involuntarily palpitate

causing my heart to skip a beat or two.

I want you to make me numb.

Make me numb…

so when I smell your perfume,

chest pains wouldn’t have to be triggered by my olfactory senses.

I want you to make me numb.

Make me numb…

so when your friendly hands pat my back,

my sensory nerves dendrites and axons

wouldn’t have to interpret it as something stinging and painful.

Make me unable to feel your touch.

Make me numb…

so that the moment I hear you’ve found another person to love,

my lungs wouldn’t forget how to respire

and tears wouldn’t have to come from my eyes.

Take away my emotions from me.

Lobotomize my brain,

cut off the part which makes me feel.

Cast a magic spell on me, transform me into a stone.

Do anything you can, just please make me numb.

After all, it’s the least you can do…

to a girl you’ve caused so much pain to…

too much

that's what i always feel whenever saturday morning comes. it's my off, at long last... hopefully i would be able to rest my mind for a while...

the past 3 months had really exhausted me.. shifted from morning to night..
given so little time, left with so much to do...

too much stress.. too much workload.. too much pressure.. too much change.. too much expectations.. too much disappointment.. too much grudge.. too much hate.. too much pity.. too much annoyance.. too much shock.. too much tolerance.. too much injustice.. too much envy.. too much responsibility.. too much demand.. too much worries..

all too much for me to handle... felt like almost giving up... i hated feeling all of those i mentioned above... coz i'm not used to feeling those negative vibes... that's not ME.
i felt so lost and wasted, i even cried several times... i was really sad.

i can say it was just lately that i was able to recover, and i'm still in the process of getting used to my new life.. i'm almost there! i'm just thinking that this was given to me because i'm deserving and i'm the most qualified for the position, and that this will make me a better person. hope i would be given more strength, patience and enthusiasm to get thru this all..

i also wanna gain my optimism back... because that was what i lost the most... :(